Mr Giggs

I am hungry.

In fact, I've been so hungry since dinner last night - after devouring a bowl of fishball noodle AND another bowl of wanton noodle - I woke up at two-thirty in the morning. Just because my stomach was growling.

I noticed. If you lie on your tummy while sleeping, somehow your tummy feels empty. Maybe that's why.

But anyhow, I woke up, went online again, rummaged through the fridge, and decided to settle for my yam-my mochis and my Ben & Jerry's. I know, not a very wise choice for late-night snacking. But screw that. I need my endorphin-rush.

A new flavor of B&J's, I'm trying. 'Half baked' - whatever that means, so long as it's chocolate-flavored.

Endorphins. The same feel-good chemicals that are released from eating chocolates as that flushed through your system after a session of sex.

Hmm.. I like the association.

I like chocolates. =)


The weekend was... eventful.

First, I was out with the brat again on Sunday. I had to send my mom and aunt around town as they picked up their stuff, and we had to bring the little brat along.

Yes, he has now elevated to 'brat' status. Becoming a monster, my gawd.

As Mom says, "He didn't turn into a monster. He's just showing his true colors now."

I was so frustrated with him, I left him alone with the older women and ran off to have my own coffee in peace. Not very nice of me, but urgh!

A whiny kid sprawling on the floor in the toys department is the last thing I want to handle.

Fuck. Do I really want to be a mom??


I met a Mr Welsh in my now-fave hangout. Both of us sipping on my now-fave Ice Cold Hoe.

He was yummy-looking, and he was sitting alone rooting for Liverpool.

Hmm... a real-life Mr Ryan Giggs. Except his dark hair wasn't curly-wurly and methinks he looks yummier.

What else were we to do but chat once my good friends left the table?

Mr Giggs has since left for Perth, but has been sending me messages on the cell. Hmm.

"When I arrive home, I will email you some pictures of Wales see what you think."

I think I will like them a lot, thank you very much. Haha.


See? I'm cool. I'm smart. I'm not ugly.

Why the fuck am I still so hung up on something else?


*****

As my recent spate of 'bumpings' go, I met another of his friends in the office today.

How long more does this have to go on?

Sigh.


I reached a breakthrough in my thinking last night.

While resting during my basketball training. Strange, but true. Seemed like my mind got cleared up or something.

I am good.

At least, I have to think I am, if I am to be me.

I deserve someone good. Someone good enough for me.

You?

Perhaps you're not that good, after all.

Good people would never be selfish and do nasty things to the ones they claim to love.

Good people stay true to their one and onlys. Not to many and maybes.


I am feeling better.

I hope the upward ride goes on longer before I start downhill again.


I can't say I'm happy now. Perhaps I'm still far from it.

There are things in the past that still upset me. And I'll never truly get over them, until I know what they really are about.

In the meantime, I'd like to get to know more Ryan Giggs and blue-eyed dark-haired hunks.

Anyone?