Rotten

So I whined to Number One Dingding, my childhood friend and also my dentist now, about the filling that chipped off and the huge gape that was left in its place, and demanded for a warranty to replace it.

An "of cos got lah", and I was skipping my way down to the atas clinic, thankful for a new filling that might now allow me to chew with the teeth on the right.

Only to find out it wasn't just the filling that chipped off, but almost the entire tooth that had already fractured bit by bit.

In orthodontic speak, the nerve was dead, the tooth was almost entirely chipped off, even a root canal treatment would not help. Dentures are passé (and apparently, harmful to the other teeth because I-can't-quite-remember-why). So it's either a bridging crown that would entail drilling off two other teeth, or a dental implant that would entail a mini operation of sorts to insert a titanium rod around which a fake tooth would be encased. Whichever I might choose, I just can't leave the hole there, because sooner or later, bacteria would creep into the deep black hole and result in an abscess, and I might eventually just die from pain.

In human speak, I am fucked. Even after a possibly "good discount" and some Medisave subsidy, a dental implant would set me back about a very "affordable" three grand - at least.

I don't know. I mean, I could try watering my money plant three times a day from tomorrow onwards. Invest in some really good shit, or fertilizer. Maybe after a month, I could dig up the soil and find some crumpled thousand-dollar notes underneath.

Just before I left the clinic, Number One Dingding called out, "Eh, you'd better be careful about the big molar on the bottom left, because it's starting to fracture too, and if you're not careful, the same might happen again."

Oh thanks. Maybe I need to buy more money plants now.

Oh. And thank you, Big Guy. With challenges like this, who ever needs Sudoku?