Thoughts

For the past two days, I have been thinking about Tommy again.

Tommy and I had a turbulent start. Like we were almost not meant to be, yet I could never unlove him - even if he didn't love me at first.

And then, barely weeks after we started our relationship, Tommy and I knew it for certain. That we were indeed not meant to be.

Tommy and I pretty much had our days together numbered.

Yet we were put in each other's path in this lifetime of ours.

I had a choice, of course, me being the upper hand.

But I could never do it. Looking into Tommy's eyes, I could never bear to cut our days short, cut our ties off.

There was the familiar question of rationality against emotion.

But I decided. If it was not time yet, I would never let go of Tommy.

Sure the day would eventually come. But before then, we would be happy together. That must have been the reason why Tommy was put in my path, in my lifetime. I would make him happy before it all ended.

So how would we know when it was time to let go? We would just know. Tommy would let me know. I would just know.

I cried and I mourned when I had to finally let Tommy go.

That is just life.

Tommy and I spent just about three months together.

Then Piper came into my life, and we have become each other's destiny.

Tommy and I had no everlasting story to talk about. Yet the impact of him, the meaning to my life, he remains a part of me I will never stop thinking nor talking about.

In the short time we did have together, he would hurt me often, even biting me and leaving me in tears. But I would never unlove him. And I will tell his story, my peculiar love, to my grandkids one day.

Tommy was, and always will be, my dog. My love. That one little spot in the corner of my heart.

This is me.

Do you really know?